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Personality MeshPersonality Mesh

Come and take a look at me

Realize what I've become

A product of unending years

Of behaviour codes, formality

Not a mask, but neither me

Visible and unvisible pieces

Of my essence, once so free…

To be loved and accepted

I sacrificed my spontaneity!

Gray Roses

The sob was quiet
splitting the worn seams
of the starless night
impaling the delicate balance
into splinters of disarray
while the rain washed away
all evidence of sorrow
now mingled and fallen
blanching the frail blooms
of scent and color
what is life without love
if not a bouquet of gray roses?

A MinuteGive me a minute, just one,
I need to think this through,
Before I say it's done.

Be patient, an answer will come.
Be kind, I do not suspend,
Time and it's implications for fun.

No, I have no reply,
Not yet, I'm working on,
The reason for 'why.'

Slipping, the seconds pass,
I know I take longest,
And I will, always, be last.

Sometimes I forget,
Because it's too hard,
For constant wonder and fret.

Optimistic Pessimism

He was squinting at the sun, trying to prove it couldn't blind him.
She was watching ants scurry across her path, pretending not to notice the cracks in the sidewalk.

She was running her fingers through her hair with her eyes closed so she wouldn't see the world tripping over itself towards the edge of nothing.
He had his hands in his pockets, kicking rocks and soda cans into the gutter, working to clean up a world that would never admit to being broken.

He wanted to tell a story, one never to be forgotten, a picture that smiled constantly despite pain's dark paint smears over the perfect white.
She wished time fit in her hands because s

The C WordThis journey began as many do
Awaiting the call and playing the fool
The telephone rang and the words fell on my ear
I dropped to my knees and couldn't even form a tear.

You must be wrong, oh it can't be me, why must you lie? You better get it right!

The word
It pierced
C word
So fierce

I can't say the word!
Can't say the C word!

Who picks the ones, who lives who dies?
All these questions, all these whys
I don't understand, it's just not right
If I can't live then why should I fight?

Now it's been 10 years and I survived
Lost many a friend who shared my fight
I can say the word now be

If Insanity is...The little pieces, the little pieces
I'm going to push all the little pieces into place

The Little Pieces
the LITTLE pieces

Fragments, fragments in my head
Nervous movements, twisted glances, fingers gripping hair roots

Fit the little pieces to the fragments

The Fragments
The fragments IN MY HEAD
Round and 'round
*Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over and over,
Expecting different results*

Insanity is:
Going 'round and 'round

The StormThe fresh scent of rain
The distant sound of thunder
Sending a warning
Of the storm approaching

A sudden gust
Of cool damp air
The skies turn black
The heavens release
Washing away the dust and the heat

The fury of the storm
Unleashed like a tempest
The wind lashing
Lightning flashing
Reminding of untamed passion

With gentleness it starts
Long slow deep kisses
Soft gentle caresses
Passion slowly increases

Touches become more firm
Warm hands roaming… seeking
Turning into Wanton lust
Beyond hot and uncontrolled
No match to the fury of storm

A Tempest let loose
A Goddess gone wild
Her passion untamed
Gone mad with

The promiseShe smiles as he looks down upon her,
holding her in his arms.
He whispers words of love
as he runs his fingers through her hair.

They stare into each other's eyes
wishing for this moment to last.

Her lips tingle
as his softly touch hers.
A soft, gentle kiss,
filled with tender passion.

Her arms tighten around him
as she pulls him closer.

A promise they make to one another,
one they shall keep for all of time.

On The EdgeShe felt the breeze and could smell the salt in the air as it crossed her face. She could see the foamy white waves crashing against the jagged rocks below. She felt the mist off the spraying waters and the moon shown bright up above. The stars were in their mystical patterns over her head but she just wanted to jump in that ragging ocean. She heard little nagging voices telling her to jump into a forever land of lush paradise of kind, loving ,gentle people to leave the cold, unmerciful world behind. "say goodbye to earth's few simple pleasures" the voices said as she walked closer to the edge. Will she awake in the beau

Kid stuffDon't forget the good times

The drugs and sex
Vibrating with melancholy passion

Fires that can't meet
Fucking furiously that they might

Gasping in air
Fingers raking pale coal in
neat four row lines of red

Every morning walking out
Every night cumming inside
Everybody's new toy

Lady ShayShe sits by the river, awaiting her love,
off in the distance, she hears a sound...
Thinking it is he, She walks toward it,
before her eyes appears, the stallion.
She walks slowly toward him, hand outstretched,
he balks...backs into the tree lined bank as if to run.
She drops her hand, and sits upon the bank,
awed by his sheer beauty.
She gazes into the water and sees her reflection
A moment passes and the stallions graceful
head appears next to hers.
She feels a slight knuzzle on her arm, she raises her
head and looks deep into his blue eyes.
He places his head into her palm

With just one look the Lady Shay had
capture

Light in the darknessI want to fill your dark spaces with light,
as you fill mine.

I want to be the light at the end of the
dark tunnel.

I want to be what brings a smile to your lips
after a long hard day.

I want to chase away those dark clouds
and bring the sunshine back in.

I want to be what calms you when the
storms seem to overwhelm you.

I want to fill the darkness with the light of the love we share.

It is never easyIt is never easy to leave you.
To turn away from your parted lips,
To turn away from the feel of your skin under my fingers.
To turn away from the warmth of your arms.
To turn away from the love that envelops us.

I carry the sound of your voice within me throughout the day,
While the warmth of your spirit folds over me.

The arch of my body against yours as we move together,
The shivers of desire that pass through me,
The passion that flows from your fingers
Electrifies me!

Never doubt that a battle does not rage within me as I turn to leave.
It is never easy
To leave you.

Just a tasteGoddess you call me as you lay me back.
Wanting only to taste my essence.
You whisper sweet words in my ear
Begging to worship your goddess,
You deftly part my thighs,
Your tongue enters me as you begin
To sip my sweet nectar.
Sighing you say, you needed
Just a taste

Destiny-Eternity-ForeverI - You - Me
Us - Together - We
Need - Wish - Dream
Yearn - Want - Desire
Honesty - Truth - Confide
Communicate - Share - Embrace
Space - Distance - Apart
Disagree - Compromise - Sacrifice
Patience - Support - Time
Then - Past - Bygones
Now - Present - Future
Destiny - Eternity - Forever

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100 Songs Challenge: 3939: The Weight of the World by Young Guns

She knows I'd do anything for her. Anything. But sometimes, I guess she asks too much. I don't think she understands that I'd do anything in the world for her, but that some things might break me.
I've tried to explain it to her. I told her – just, maybe once you could take some of my burden. She tries. I know she does. But she's so wrapped up in everything going on in her life that sometimes she forgets how much she asks of me.
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Memory -excerptI pushed him. It's just what we do. We mess around. But then he fell and it was like Cay and something in my subconcious connected the two. But it was subconcious - how was I supposed to realise? Until I had the flash, that is and then I knew something was wrong and I just couldn't do anything about it. I just had to stand there and try to hold down that feeling. Just stand there and watch as my mind slipped away from me. Such a horrible feeling. One you just can't resist. And then I was falling and it was Cay all over again, with the silent screams in the dark and the music trying to drown out the pain...

You have no idea...

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Insomnia

by ~IATSATH, Mar 6, 2010, 4:07:10 AM
Literature / Prose / Non-Fiction / Emotional

Insomnia or Thoughts In The Late-Night-Early-Morning

I lay still awake
Late night early morning thoughts
Running through my head

What happens in the late night early morning dark is this. One stupid song lets out one stupid memory which lets out one whole year of grief which refuses to go back into the little box in the back of my head that I forced it into last year. In one fell swoop it all comes back and then the tears won't stop. My mind grabs at anything in its attempt to put all the tears back in the box in the back of my head where they belong. As it does, my hand reaches for the worn old bear who sits in the corner of the bed, waiting there for just such an occasion. And with the bear clutched to my chest, my mind fights for control of my emotions. It grabs the pen and pad from the floor, the mobile phone for light and sets to work. The light is poor, the eyes are tired, but the tears have stopped.

And the pen is running out.

01:46am 6/3/10

Insomniaby ~IATSATH

Literature / Prose / Non-Fiction / Emotional

I feel a small explanation is in order. For me to get to sleep I have to listen to music. For some reason the song "Private Emotion" by Ricky Martin decided last night to trigger the most random memory of my gran. In the rather likely event that you don't know, my gran died of cancer on March 10th last year and I've been dreading how I'm going to feel on the anniversary. As it is, I think most of what would have happened actually happened last night and since it's very hard to sleep when you're having what I can only describe as a minor breakdown, I started writing. Please keep this in mind if you're kind enough to comment.

If you liked this piece (and even if you didn't) why not check out this wonderful poem by ~child-of-exiles:

Sleep has not caught me yet, And the dawn is fast approaching. From the kitchen I hear the coffee pot start, Wheezing like an old man on a frozen morning. I slide the quilt down an inch,
So that only my eyes peek over the top And stare out the window at the stars Wondering if you are watching them too; Wondering if you are wondering if I am watching them. A billion photos scatter over the sky Using the stars as tacks, meteors as strings. I wonder if you read the stars,
If you would remember me And smile.
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=Echostar08 May 4, 2010

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~IATSATH May 4, 2010 Hobbyist General Artist

Thank you so much.

=Echostar08 May 4, 2010

~asterkat Mar 25, 2010 Hobbyist Photographer

Thank you for sharing this story with us.

~BTDubbs Mar 23, 2010 Hobbyist Photographer

Thank you for living.
And thank you for sharing.
Thank you for feeling the way that you felt.

Thank you for fighting.
And thank you for rising.
Thank you for riding the waves of the world.

Thank you for trying.
And thank you for crying.
Thank you for writing as ever you do.

Thank you for you.